I'm at my parents house, have spent the day visiting my father at the hospital. It was good to see him although it is wierd when the people you have grown accustomed to being strong around you all of a sudden are weak and unable to manage.
The thought of loosing him scares me, I know its not something that will happen now, he's threw the surgery and recovering well, but the thought of loosing him still scares me. The thought of loosing my mother scares me as well... How are you supposed to manage without them? Doesn't their job include taking care of me? Ok, so I'm grown up and I mostly take care of myself, but its like having a security net in life, having them there... always available! I've grown used to always being able to come running home when I can't take it any more... what happens the day that they're no longer here to run to? Who am I supposed to run to then? Who will dry my tears? Hold me for no other reason than I need a hug? Or who will just be there, when I need nothing else but silent acceptance?
Scary thought, so far they are here and they will be for a yet a few more years... I'll cherrish each moment and love them to bits :)
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